I have toyed with the idea of a post devoted to mothers for months now. Finally, I have decided to write it today on my own mother's birthday.
You may wonder what qualifies me to give advice to mothers since I am not one. I have a mother though and so I consider myself an expert. It is my belief that parenthood is the most important job in the world. Parents call their children their greatest accomplishments. They say that raising children is the most fulfilling thing they've ever done. This is not what I am referring to. I am talking about saying things to Austin that I've heard my mother say to my dad. I refer to my love of fantasy and science fiction, my taste in music, my anxieties, my obsessive organization, my writing skills, my love of books and British television, my aversion to spicy foods, my devotion to crocheting, my belief in education, my open mind and overflowing heart. I refer to the essence of myself, all of which can be traced to one of my parents.
I am me because my parents are who they are. I might have been different. Austin might have been different. My nephews might have been different. The whole world might be different based on what parents taught their children. This is why I consider parenthood the most important job ever: because parents make the world what it is.
So mothers have to be careful what they teach us. Obvious, right? But I think our mothers have missed something. This is not directed at my mother but all of them, including the one I hope to be someday. It's not enough to teach us that we are beautiful and perfect and loved just the way we are. You have to teach us that you are beautiful too.
The older we get, the more we become like you and I, for one, celebrate this. It gives me courage and confidence. Because I am like my mother, there is hope I will achieve all that I want to. But there is danger too. Will our mothers teach us that we are perfect now but we are destined to be made ugly by aging? Will my body be destroyed by my own future motherhood? We learn in our youth that every birthday is an important one because we are always worthy of celebration. Mothers, will you teach us that, at a certain age, we should not celebrate getting older anymore?
Mothers, assure us that we will not one day lose our self-worth. Teach us that we will always be beautiful and perfect and just the right size. Teach us that it will always be more important to be smart and kind than thin and feminine. Teach us that another candle on the cake is something to be grateful for because life is a blessing. Please.
Teach us that you are beautiful so we can believe that we will be too.
